Brotherly Love

 

Right around 4:30 am every morning I get the bird whistle alert of a text message. It has become one of my favorite things in the mornings. Without fail, it is my big brother. He is checking in or to see if I have made it to the gym yet. We exchange a handful of texts that vary about our workouts, how sore we are, or what we did the day before. Some weeks it is to encourage one another to just keep going when we feel unmotivated. That was my role last week. Rob was not feeling it and I was able to check in and let him know to keep pushing. We did not make an accountability agreement; it has just become that for us. I was excited to see his text this morning that said he had totaled fifty miles of running last week. He indeed pushed himself for the week. 

Our relationship was not always like this. In fact, it was rather tumultuous after our dad died. It was not from a state of hatred or anger, but because of pain. Death of a parent will do that to you, as I am sure some reading this understand. I do believe that time heals as it has for us. 

He and I have always had a fairly typical brotherly relationship. As I was on one of my runs last week, I spent a lot of time thinking about our relationship. He took every chance he could to punish and torture me and I took every chance I could to rat him out as the cycle goes. It started when I was five years old and he taught me this “fun game”, where I run, and he trips me. In about the third run by, I landed on my shoulder and broke my collarbone. Another time, he and a couple of his friends tied me up to a wheel barrel during a stormy day in the summer. They stood in the house laughing as the sounds of lightning and thunder rang out, which they could barely hear over my prepubescent screaming. All pretty normal things for a big brother to do. He had this game when he was driving that he would reach over grab my leg and squeeze until I would yelp for him to stop. If I tried to retaliate, he would say, “don't touch me I am driving, you want us to wreck”? 

On the flip side of the torture was a protector. I always knew my brother had my back even when I deserved the repercussions I had incurred. In grade school, I was running my mouth to a kid who turned and punched me in the face (deserved). I was lying on the ground next to a car, holding my eye. I could see the feet of the kid who just clocked me and the feet of my brother. The kid’s feet then seemingly levitated for a second, as my brother had shoved him so hard, he came out of his shoes. My brother was there, no question asked. I know he would go to war for me even if I didn't deserve it. Several years ago, I had gotten into an altercation with another parent at my daughter's basketball game. Tempers were high and I was sitting in my car as the individual was blocking my door for me to get out. I looked in my mirror and my brother was locked and loaded behind me. As if he was saying I got you if you need me. Clear minds prevailed and we all left without serious altercation. I have many stories of my brother and his willingness to fight for or with me. He has this terrifying look that raises the hair on your neck. Just know if you see that, you should turn and walk away. I have on many occasions. 

What does all this have to do with fitness? I read this quote this week, “If I have seen further, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants” Isaac Newton, and last week I talked about how strong my wife is. This week it’s my brother. The people in your court are always going to be important to your success. The people you want in your court are the ones that build you up and will fight for you. The ones that don’t fight for you or encourage you, don't deserve the privilege to share in your success.

I would not be where I am and working as hard as I have without the people in my life. My brother is my hero! I hope to be the man he is. He does not really know the impact he has had on my life. He has led me in silence, by how he talks about his faith, his workouts, and his work ethic. The good and the bad of our relationship has only brought us closer to this day. 

To close: 75 Hard is going well. I have one week left. I have leaned out and I am getting closer to my goal. I am down to 205, which is nine pounds lower than when I started. Last week I went hard on workouts: forty-five minutes of weight training in the morning with an added twenty-minute HIIT workout, then 4-5 mile run in the afternoon. Sunday, I had an active recovery day that resulted in two forty-five-minute walks, one indoor and one outdoor. And I spent the day preparing for this week.