Against the Firewalking Wall

The Mirror 15 years ago I was in a small men's group at my church. We were all talking about the challenges we were facing as men from the previous week. I don’t remember what I was speaking about other than it was revolving around shame and low self-esteem. I do remember one of the older men in the group saying something to me that has stuck with me to this day. He said to me, “you need to get to a point where you can stand in front of the mirror naked and look at yourself, but not just look at yourself. Look at yourself in the eyes. When you can do that, then you will know you are ok with being who you are.”  A couple of days later I tried, and I could not do it. I did not like the man I was, how I looked, and how I was living. I could look into my own eyes and know that every situation I was in was because of my choices in life. That is the power of the mirror. When I looked directly into the mirror, I could not hide from anything.  People spend all kinds of time in front o...

  David Goggins coined the phrase “Pain Cave (PC)”. It is the moment when a person begins to waiver or struggle through whatever challenge they are facing at that moment. David Goggins is an acquired taste, but I have found his writing to be a way to push myself harder. The PC is the battle that is faced in our head. Anytime we start to become uncomfortable and there is a struggle to start or feel like stopping, that is the entrance to the PC.    My alarm goes off at 4am Monday through Friday. On a side note, has anyone noticed that the snooze button is much bigger than the stop button? No wonder people hit the snooze button so often. Hitting the stop button is like hitting a bullseye on the dart board from 40 feet away with crusty eyes. Anyway, I lay in bed for about 20 seconds and the PC starts. I don't want to get up, but now I am like a robot. The first thing I do is turn on my light next to the bed. I stagger towards the main light in the bedroom. I put on my clothes...

    Consistency builds the mental strength that fortifies our ability to succeed during moments of unpredictability that occur in life. Over the last few weeks, I have been talking about finding ways to be consistent and building habits. Our brains thrive on consistency and habits. Our brain also thrives on not wanting to change those habits or behaviors. It can be so mentally taxing, and I don't think people in general give enough credit to our brains' response to change.   Tim S. Grover wrote “The fact is you can't train your body - or excel at anything - before you train your brain. You can’t commit to excellence until your mind is ready to take you there. Teach the mind to train the body”.  I recently read about a guy who was in a construction accident that resulted in him losing one of his arms. He was working to be a pro rugby player at the time. The incident threw him into a tailspin that resulted in a lot of unhealthy choices. I would imagine many people...